Some parents are uncomfortable talking to their kids about sex. As soon as they start being around other kids, you can teach them about respecting other people and talking about their feelings. Get to know your kid’s friends, their parents, and especially the parents of anyone your kid may be dating. Ask them how they think they’ll know when they’re ready to have sex, including the responsibilities that come with it (like preventing unintended pregnancy and STDs). Chimamanda makes the point that the concept of gender tells us how we "should" be in society. Would you like to go to the Nigeria website? Would love your thoughts, please comment. How Open Should I Be When We Talk? Since taking over TED in the early 2000s, Chris Anderson has shown how carefully crafted short talks can be the key to unlocking empathy, stirring excitement, spreading knowledge, and … When your kid comes to you with a question about sex and relationships, take a second and appreciate the good job you’ve done to get you to this point. That means being there when your teen hosts to make sure there aren’t drugs or alcohol around. Ask about their friends, and get to know them and their parents. View all the Trophies here Discourage preteens and teens from going out on school nights and dating or hanging out with older teens or young adults. Try to work through your embarrassment. Plus, the more practice you get answering tough questions, the easier it becomes. Quit thinking about it so much and just do it. You will receive a link to create a new password via email. Conversations will go differently depending on whether you choose to be … When preteens and teens are invited to each other’s houses or to parties, make sure there are going to be adults there. We Should Talk.—yes, properly styled with the intimidating full-stop—looks like my kind of puzzle. and check in regularly to be sure those expectations are met. Check in with them to ask what they learned, what was confusing, and answer any questions they may have. As soon as kids start learning to talk, you can teach them the names of the parts of their body. Don’t worry if your kid is in middle or high school and you haven’t started talking with them about this stuff yet. photoshopped celebrities or models), Ads for pads and tampons, birth control, or condoms. You’ll wind up thinking what if this happens or what if that happens. You can say:  “Can you tell me what you already know about that?” or “What have you heard about that?”. Help us improve - how could this information be more helpful? By listening to them and allowing them to negotiate, it shows that you respect them and understand that they are becoming more responsible for themselves. Just don’t try to “catch up” all at once — that can be overwhelming. The most important thing is to make it really clear to your kid that they can ask you questions or come to you for support without fear of shame or judgment. So how do you keep the conversation age-appropriate? Thanks for your feedback. Here are some other ways to kick off a conversation: In elementary and middle school, give them books about anatomy or puberty and let them explore them on their own. I’m not sure how to explain it/what the answer is. What messages do we send about how women "should" behave versus how Here is my 100% Guide for We Should Talk! Check in with them regularly about what’s going on with them and their peers at school. The best way to keep your kids safe and healthy is to stay involved in their lives and to set some boundaries. Can your relationship survive the night? Advertising. Encourage them in their hobbies and interests. Talking with your kid about sex, relationships, and their health is a lifelong conversation. Start with an open ended question like: “What do you know about how pregnancy happens?”, “What do you think about the fact that that celebrity is photoshopped on the cover to look different than they do in real life?”, “How do you feel about this ad for dolls only having pink and girls in it?”, “What would you do if someone you were dating started acting like that character on this TV show?”. Donations are tax-deductible to the fullest extent allowable under the law. Planned Parenthood has a partner website about sexual health topics specifically for Nigeria.